114 – Q&A: Talking Forgiveness, Friendship…and Fat

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While we change our habits and mindset to pursue the goals that matter to us most, it’s important not to forget to make loving ourselves and others a top priority too. For today’s show, Ben and Ashleigh will be talking about this concept using three keywords – friendship, forgiveness, and fat! Before that, though, we hear their thoughts on cardio workouts, breath work, enduring pain, different ideal physiques, and why it’s important that efforts to achieve a goal be motivated by personal development rather than trophies. Next up, Ben opens up about his personal journey with bodybuilding, his parents, and the relationships he undervalued along the way. He has realized that the pursuit of optimal health should be far more well-rounded, and this involves cherishing those who matter – even if they have hurt you. Sometimes we get resentful about a person’s behavior, as Ben did with his dad, and he shares some techniques he used to develop more empathy that led him toward forgiveness and ultimately, more love. We hear about the community Ben is trying to build next, and how important this notion is for creating a shared sense of support.

From there, Ben and Ashley talk about the idea that achieving a goal – burning fat for instance – is all about changing one’s habits and mindset. Our hosts show a lot of vulnerability and share meaningful ways to be a happier, healthier, and more loving person in this episode so it’s definitely one to tune in for. Before wrapping things up though, they get into some listener questions about recovering from hernias, getting better sleep, and how to gauge if one’s resting heart rate is too low, before sharing about their love for some of the well-known products mentioned on this show. This includes BLUblox, today’s sponsor, so head over to https://blublox.com/muscleintelligence and get 15% off your first order using the code ‘muscle’!


  • Thoughts on coronavirus and countries that are opening up. [0:18]
  • Ben’s outdoor breath control cardio workouts and the Muscle Intelligence Trilogy. [3:02]
  • Why cardio workouts are not for fat burning but increasing the body’s recovery ability. [6:21]
  • Box breathing, enduring pain, and Ashleigh’s James Fitzgerald step-up test experience. [7:59]
  • Breathing’s place in pursuing fitness mastery and celeb athletes engaged in MI40. [12:14]
  • Erin Stern’s figure transformation and thoughts on different ideal figures. [15:13]
  • Working out for a trophy or for the sake of personal development. [17:41]
  • The importance of valuing friends even while neurotically pursuing a goal. [19:33]
  • Realizations Ben has come to and his gift for coaching holistic wellness. [21:45]
  • How Ben released his anger at his dad and himself through forgiveness. [25:07]
  • The importance of community for assisting others who then reciprocate. [32:59]
  • Supporting people through struggle versus cutting toxic people out. [37:10]
  • Ben’s acid test for who he’ll train: people who take ownership. [39:44]
  • Beating fat: changing is not hard, but a matter of shifting beliefs and habits. [41:01]
  • Ben’s experiment using olive oil to shift his phospholipid bilayer. [44:08]
  • Why people get hernias and step by step guidelines for recovering from one. [47:58]
  • How to get better deep and REM sleep using L-theanine and taurine. [53:33]
  • When to know if a low resting heart rate is a cause for concern. [58:39]
  • The brilliant job BLUblox products do for improving sleep. [1:04:01]
  • Benefits of grass-fed meat from Belcampo over grain-fed. [1:06:10]

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Ben Pakulski

Ben Pakulski

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About the Podcast

Formerly the Muscle Expert Podcast. The world’s top authority on intelligent muscle building and fat loss gives us a simple to understand deep dive into the complex world of building a body you love, and living your greatness. Weekly interviews with leading experts in a vast number of scientific fields focusing on health optimization (nutrition, sleep, hormones, mindfulness and mind set), strength, (both physical and mental), and muscle hypertrophy. Learn proven strategies for optimum life performance, whether it be in the gym, the board room or the bedroom; this is the blueprint for becoming the upgraded modern man. Ladies, this podcast is for you too. The topics, tips, and life hacks covered are essential for every individual who wants to upgrade themselves mentally and physically.

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